Cure for the Common Fuck-up

You don't have to belch up every half-baked, insecure, piece of bullshit of which you can think. You can be a better man. Give yourself a smooth nickname, and in your head say, "'Nickname' play it cool."

Reflect, Mirror, Re-felch

I think that most women see their hair as an extension of themselves. But ever since I shaved my head and let the hair grow back, it has felt like a wig.